Another ‘cunning plan’?
Britain’s rising number of elderly is becoming a problem. Not
only do they block access to services that otherwise could be used by Jamie
Oliver’s kitchen brigades of work hungry East Europeans, but the elderly’s fits
of muddle-headedness also cause difficulties.
No one is more elderly than God, and if old mortals get confused, how much more
can he who is from everlasting suffer? Fortunately he has now got a first rate
carer in Archbishop Justin. The Archbishop has realized that, in his muddled
state, God got it wrong by invoking wrath upon Sodom and Gomorrah when he should
have made Lot do a Boris and march in their Gay Pride processions.
Justin has now apologized for the way in which the Church formerly treated
homosexuals. Not that Justin’s apology broke new ground. Archbishops of
Canterbury who do so come unstuck – witness Becket and Cranmer. Welby accepted
the liberal consensus followed by fellow Etonians, David Cameron and Boris
Johnson. State school oiks would say that having been at a public school
explains their attitudes, but these sour souls have so many chips on their
shoulders that they are unable to shoulder other people’s burdens, such as the
discrimination suffered by such oppressed and silenced gays as Elton John, Lord
Mandelson and Clare Balding.
Not that Etonians introduced the fashion for apologizing. Fettes-educated Tony
Blair first trod the Via Apologia saying that Britain was to blame for the Irish
potato famine.
Four apologists – all male. Gender fascism? Step forward St Theresa – of
Maidenhead, not Avila. Mrs May apologized for the Tories being the ‘nasty
party.’ Result? The Conservatives half won the 2010 election.
For the modern CofE, half of anything is a feast.
Alan Edwards